Comments on: Searching for Answers http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/ A collaborative blog advocating ethics in adoption Fri, 27 Jan 2012 00:31:26 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: karen http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/comment-page-1/#comment-1633 karen Thu, 17 Apr 2008 10:48:37 +0000 http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/#comment-1633 Hi. I am a journalist working on a story about international adoptions. If there are any Americans who are having difficulty in completing their adoptions in Vietnam and would like to discuss their story with me, please be in touch. Thank you. Hi. I am a journalist working on a story about international adoptions. If there are any Americans who are having difficulty in completing their adoptions in Vietnam and would like to discuss their story with me, please be in touch. Thank you.

]]> By: M.E. http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/comment-page-1/#comment-1558 M.E. Fri, 04 Apr 2008 02:59:52 +0000 http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/#comment-1558 Getting back to "Searching for Answers," ~ why is it that some provinces have had difficulty with the investigations...and others, undergoing similar investigations, have not? IMO, it comes down to ethical conduct from both parties. We are one of the families affected (PAP, Quang Nam), and although it is dfficult to digest, the option of withdrawing our I-600 in exchange for transparency and clarity in the province is clearly a possibility. This is about doing what is right and ethical; and modifying the system so that this never happens again to any child and family. Getting back to “Searching for Answers,” ~
why is it that some provinces have had difficulty
with the investigations…and others, undergoing
similar investigations, have not? IMO, it comes down
to ethical conduct from both parties. We are one of the
families affected (PAP, Quang Nam), and although it is
dfficult to digest, the option of withdrawing our I-600
in exchange for transparency and clarity in the province is clearly a possibility. This is about doing what is right and ethical; and
modifying the system so that this never happens again to any child and family.

]]> By: Nicki http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/comment-page-1/#comment-1539 Nicki Wed, 02 Apr 2008 15:40:25 +0000 http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/#comment-1539 Yep, me too. Yep, me too.

]]> By: Nicki http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/comment-page-1/#comment-1538 Nicki Wed, 02 Apr 2008 15:39:34 +0000 http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/#comment-1538 So if we agree that it may be what is needed and we agree that it may be legally impossible, where does that leave us? Do we just stop processing orphan petitions because we can not be sure that harm has not been done without an investigation? Do we process them anyway, possibly feeding into the corruption by enabling it and turning a blind eye? It seems to me that no matter what the options are, someone's laws will be broken unless the program is just shut down. I think we should be careful about presuming what is happening behind the scenes. Unless you have a direct line to these particular diplomats, there is no clear way of knowing whether they are pursuing other ideas (or not!). Right now there is a lot of presumption that they are not working for us simply because we are not hearing about every conversation, privy to every communication and being debriefed weekly. Because it is important TO ME to keep the program open AND ethical, and becuase I do NOT know if the government is being diplomatic or what their talks have consisted of and what is going on behind the scenes, I am also not willing to SOLELY place in their hands the duty of finding a solution. The last MOU was signed due in part to a group of PAPs & APs who pushed for it and worked hard to make it happen. It isn't just government officials who can be diplomatic and push for change. So I'm not presuming the government is or is not pushing for diplomatic solutions but I *am* pushing for them through other productive means. But what I'm seeing a lot of right now isn't so much diplomatic ideas or suggestions for change but outright attack of the government frequently based on presumptions and assumptions. And a LOT of "bring our children home NOW NOW NOW, laws be damned". This is neither diplomatic nor in the best interest of the future of the program. Of course most PAPs stuck in these situations are primarily concerned with their child and the children of their friends but there are many MANY future children who stand to be affected on the actions of those of us *today*. So if we agree that it may be what is needed and we agree that it may be legally impossible, where does that leave us? Do we just stop processing orphan petitions because we can not be sure that harm has not been done without an investigation? Do we process them anyway, possibly feeding into the corruption by enabling it and turning a blind eye? It seems to me that no matter what the options are, someone’s laws will be broken unless the program is just shut down.

I think we should be careful about presuming what is happening behind the scenes. Unless you have a direct line to these particular diplomats, there is no clear way of knowing whether they are pursuing other ideas (or not!). Right now there is a lot of presumption that they are not working for us simply because we are not hearing about every conversation, privy to every communication and being debriefed weekly. Because it is important TO ME to keep the program open AND ethical, and becuase I do NOT know if the government is being diplomatic or what their talks have consisted of and what is going on behind the scenes, I am also not willing to SOLELY place in their hands the duty of finding a solution. The last MOU was signed due in part to a group of PAPs & APs who pushed for it and worked hard to make it happen. It isn’t just government officials who can be diplomatic and push for change. So I’m not presuming the government is or is not pushing for diplomatic solutions but I *am* pushing for them through other productive means. But what I’m seeing a lot of right now isn’t so much diplomatic ideas or suggestions for change but outright attack of the government frequently based on presumptions and assumptions. And a LOT of “bring our children home NOW NOW NOW, laws be damned”. This is neither diplomatic nor in the best interest of the future of the program. Of course most PAPs stuck in these situations are primarily concerned with their child and the children of their friends but there are many MANY future children who stand to be affected on the actions of those of us *today*.

]]> By: L http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/comment-page-1/#comment-1537 L Wed, 02 Apr 2008 13:57:37 +0000 http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/#comment-1537 IF this is true - it will increase the number of abandonments AND I certainly hope they grandfather in all existing referrals and any babies which were relinquished before April 1st (or whatever date this becomes effective) because you can NOT change the relinquishments rules/requirements AFTER the baby is already at the orphanage - that is not fair to the birthparent(s) and many will be hard to find and track down once they have dropped off the baby, in some cases many months ago or even years ago..... /L IF this is true – it will increase the number of abandonments AND I certainly hope they grandfather in all existing referrals and any babies which were relinquished before April 1st (or whatever date this becomes effective) because you can NOT change the relinquishments rules/requirements AFTER the baby is already at the orphanage – that is not fair to the birthparent(s) and many will be hard to find and track down once they have dropped off the baby, in some cases many months ago or even years ago…..

/L

]]> By: Amy http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/comment-page-1/#comment-1536 Amy Wed, 02 Apr 2008 13:27:32 +0000 http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/#comment-1536 Sara - that was my initial thought, too... Sara – that was my initial thought, too…

]]> By: Sara http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/comment-page-1/#comment-1535 Sara Wed, 02 Apr 2008 13:07:28 +0000 http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/#comment-1535 I thought the USCIS was concerned about there being so many abondonments. Won't this cause there to be even more mothers abondoning their babies rather than reliquishing them - to avoid DNA testing? I thought the USCIS was concerned about there being so many abondonments. Won’t this cause there to be even more mothers abondoning their babies rather than reliquishing them – to avoid DNA testing?

]]> By: Sarah http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/comment-page-1/#comment-1534 Sarah Wed, 02 Apr 2008 12:31:30 +0000 http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/#comment-1534 This is the information that I have received as well. This is the information that I have received as well.

]]> By: S http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/comment-page-1/#comment-1533 S Wed, 02 Apr 2008 12:24:59 +0000 http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/#comment-1533 I thought the USCIS was concerned about there being so many more abandonment cases vs relinquishment. Don't you think this will cause more mothers to abandon their children rather then relinqish them - so they won't have to go through DNA testing? I thought the USCIS was concerned about there being so many more abandonment cases vs relinquishment. Don’t you think this will cause more mothers to abandon their children rather then relinqish them – so they won’t have to go through DNA testing?

]]> By: isabella http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/comment-page-1/#comment-1532 isabella Wed, 02 Apr 2008 05:33:55 +0000 http://www.adoptionintegrity.com/2008/03/30/searching-for-answers/#comment-1532 Our agency told us about the DNA testing and stated that it is for cases of relinquishment, not abandonment. The wording on the memo is terrible. Our agency told us about the DNA testing and stated that it is for cases of relinquishment, not abandonment. The wording on the memo is terrible.

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